Monday, 15 August 2011

The Other Guys

I would have loved to be present at the meeting when the Hollywood producer pitched The Other Guys to his boss.

Producer: “So here’s what I’m thinking, Frank. We take two beloved action stars The Rock and Samuel L Jackson…”

Frank: “Yes?”

Producer: “And we put them together in a buddy cop movie.”

Frank: “Cha-ching, baby! We’ll make a fortu-“

Producer: “Then they die twenty minutes in and are replaced by the guy who ruined the Planet of the Apes remake and an aging comedian who is about as funny as a Nazi concentration camp.”

I’m no stranger to insanity. Every day I get out of the shower and wear my towel over one shoulder because I like to pretend I’m a Roman senator, but even I wouldn’t greenlight this. The Other Guys is a horrible movie because it lets you glimpse biblical levels of awesomeness and then violently rips it away from you, stubbornly refusing to be the movie you want it to be.

47 comments:

  1. On the bright side, Sam Jackson's cameo in this movie was so damn short, he had time to do a narrative to "Go the Fuck to Sleep."

    Epic reading, Mace Windu.

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  2. Sad very sad, so few great movies these days. But still, there are the old classics to entertain us right?

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  3. Not making me want to rush out and see that one.

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  4. "Desk pop!" I still got a couple stupid giggles out of the whole lion/shark scenario but overall this was an incredibly stupid movie. Pretty accurate recap.

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  5. Idaho – I would have gladly sacrificed that for an entire movie based on Samuel and The Rock. Every scene with them is gold. “You shut your face! If we want to hear you talk, I will shove my hand up your ass and work you like a puppet!”

    HeadAche – Let the nostalgia flow.

    Mynx – Flee!

    Jewels – They’d have to fill my lungs with Joker gas before I’d so much as crack a smile. There seems to be this whole comedy style of Ricky Gervais bumbling awkwardness, and the only time I’ve seen it done correctly is in Scott Pilgrim:

    http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=wy-eowf2Stc&feature=related

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  6. I actually thought this movie was okay.

    And I happen to like Will Ferrel, I do genuinely think he is a talented actor and comedian. Trouble just is that half the time he has so shitty material to work with that it's a pain.

    Land of the Lost, now that was a sin of a movie and so crappy from day one that there just was no salvation at all.

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  7. I haven’t seen Land of the Lost, I’m assuming it was awful in its entirety. I hate a movie more if it shows huge potential and then blows it (I Am Legend springs to mind). Nobody gets my hopes up and lives!

    I liked Ferrell in Blades of Glory, even though the movie had only one joke that kept going for 90 minutes.

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  8. Drake, this movie was bad for sure, but I have to admit that I did laugh out loud when Marky Mark was tearing on Will Ferrell's character and told him that he probably farted like a baby blowing out a birthday candle.

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  9. Yeah, this movie was awful. I barely cracked a smile throughout the whole thing. I mean, God, I get it -- Will Ferrell is old and ugly and he has a hot wife. So what?

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  10. I had a momentary urge to see this movie, but I laid down until the feeling passed.

    Glad to see I won't have to reconsider my stance...

    Pearl

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  11. This makes me want to cry tears of rage. So close to true awesomeness...

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  12. Her face the book of praises, where is read. Supporting!

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  13. Based on the fact that Will Ferrell is in this movie, I will never see it. Mark Whalberg I'm cool with. Will Ferrell, I'm not. EVER.

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  14. Yeah, this looked bad and from your description, I would not even be bothered to take a look... Thanks for the review, Drake! <3 A lovely day for you! <3 <3 <3 *

    +Rei Bathory+

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  15. I'm waiting for it to come out on Redbox.

    And then I'll wait until I have a coupon for a free rental.

    Then, it will maybe be worth the (lack of) money spent. :)

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  16. Overall, I have to agree with you here. I like certain scenes of this movie a lot though. For instance, when Eva Mendes is on screen.

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  17. Haha, I think we can all appreciate the bounciness of Eva Mendes.

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  18. Totally missed this one. My buddy comedy radar is so far off-kilter that I thought The Change-Up was going to be a romantic comedy.

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  19. i watched this drivel..cuz i like all four of the actors mentioned...

    and let me tell you there is not enough brain bleach in the world to fix the shit deposit that his movie left me with...

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  20. I can only say that I am not surprised that this movie tanked. I have not seen it but dare I ask, not even an "Oscar worthy performance" by, "The Rock" could save this movie? Oh the horror!

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  21. i actually watched the first 30 minutes of the movie, then it turned to crap. http://2stupid2live.blogspot.com/

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  22. I haven't watched this one...and now I absolutely won't. It sounds like they ruined a good concept. What else it new these days. :/

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  23. I've heard so many people say that it's not that good, but then I hear people quoting lines from it all the time!

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  24. Here, here! I felt cheated out of a movie that never was. The trailer suggested a cool cop and not so cool cop rivalry, what we got was not so cool cop and other not so cool cop doing not so cool things! Do you know what i'm trying to say? Nope, me neither.

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  25. I sometimes think they agonise so much about creating these damn movies that they forget that they're supposed to be entertaining.

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  26. i gave you the overlord award!
    yeah...

    that is how i roll...

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  27. Omg drake. Where hav u gone too?

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  28. I feel sad ;-; Drake has not come back Dx

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  29. Drake, where have you been lately? I miss your cynicism.

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  30. Oh I dunno, so many movies seem to be like this these days, in that I read the blurb and watch them and half way through (or a quarter way through) (or five minutes in) I realise there's something else I'd really rather do, like clean the bathroom.

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  31. I love you darling and your Blogs. Where have you gone?

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  32. Where the heck have you been man! I've missed your smart ass comments soooo much!

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  33. Darn it. I meant to add a (?) to my question.

    Why can't I be smart?

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  34. The most I remember from that movie is a one-liner that goes something like, "I'm a peacock, you gotta let me fly on this one [boss]."

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  35. Why aren't you updating anymore? I need you in my blog life, because you are so damn blog funny. I am stealing that towel bit. I'll try it a soon as next week sfter I shower next. I am a water conservationist, and not very stinky.

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  36. Why don't you blog anymore? You're one of my favourites!

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  37. Just returning a little appreciation. And Charlotte is right, why aren't you blogging anymore?

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  38. I did not expect 'biblical levels of awesomeness' from this movie, not even in the first 20. it's done well for itself!

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  39. I might be the only person I know that actually really likes The Rock!

    Just started following you, would love it if you followed me back on my adventure travel blog :)

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  40. Replies
    1. Now say that in Batman's voice.

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    2. Real Batman use ultrasound.

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